Your family tree has one branch

You might be a redneck if you look at your wife's new earrings that she is wearing and think that you could make a couple great fishing lures out of them.

•A night on the town includes city jail.
•All of your relatives' cars have "Tag Stolen" signs in the rear window.
•All your wall decorations have horns on them.
•All your wedding guests were seated on the same side of the church
•Every workday ends with the same argument about who gets to ride in the cab of the truck.
•Everyone in the house learns something from the potty training videotape.
•Most of your family have appeared on COPS.
•Neither your nor your husband's job requires you to wear a shirt to work
•Nobody can rebuild an engine like mama.
•The beer truck delivers door-to-door in your neighborhood.
•The biggest sign on your place of business says "Minnows!"
•The quality of your birthday present depends on how mama finishes in the wet t-shirt contest.
•You've ever been accused of lying through your tooth.
•You've ever borrowed chewing tobacco from your wife.
•You've ever eaten out of a minnow bucket.
•You can't spell your name without looking at your belt.
•You consider a spotlight hunting equipment.
•You have a black eye and a hickey at the same time.
•You have orange road cones in your living room.
•You take a spit cup out on the dance floor.
•You thought Ned Beatty was sexy in Deliverance.
•You use your daughter's wedding as an excuse to buy a new shotgun.
•You went to the gun and knife show more than once in the same weekend (guilty)
•Your tooth has a cavity.
•Your toothbrush has been in the family for generations.
•Your truck has ever been the scene of a crime.

You might be a "redneck" if at your divorce hearing you ask the judge "if we get a divorce will she still be my sister"?

You might be a redneck if you stare really hard at a can of frozen orange juice because it says 'concentrate'.

If your dog doubles as a dishwasher, you might be a redneck. If your wife's ok with it, you ARE a redneck!

If your mama doesn't have to take the Marlboro out her mouth before she tells the cop to kiss her a$$, you are probably a redneck. . .

If you have ever used a bar stool for a walker... you might be a redneck

you might be a redneck if your bookcase looks like this....

I've cut my grass and found parts for a mustang.
I have had to move a transmission to take a bath.

Sent from my Transformer TF101 using Ohub Campfire mobile app

Last fall we finished hunting and returned to my father's house cleaned our pheasants. Then took off our muddy & bloody clothes. Then sat down and in our long legged underwear & began to watch NASCAR & have a Beer.
Well you know what happened my Brothers best friend stopped by & said you must be Rednecks Drinking Beer & watching NASCAR in your Underwear. Laughed so hard we all had tears coming down our faces.

You walk your 9 year old son to school cuz your in the same grade.

If you're box stand for hunting has crown molding but your home does not.

You might be a redneck if:
1. You have a Copenahgen can tattooed on you a$$ cheek pocket of your Wranglers.
2. You wear a CAT diesel hat as you top off your gas rig.
3. You need a step ladder to get into the above gas powered fire engine red Ford 4X4.
4. Your fire engine red Ford 4x4 has more diamond plate then the local hook and latter truck.
5. You open carry an auto loader instead of a wheel gun.
I was witness to this in a Cosco parking lot at the pumps while living in AZ. It was really quite the site, my wife and I laughed for 30 minutes on the drive home saying, "you might be a redneck if!"

If you know over half the people pictured in your local "Bad and Busted" magazine.

.... your uncle throws an 1100 from the tree stand over a stovepipe.