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Dogs' letters to God

Dear God, How come people love to smell flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another? Where are their damn priorities?

Dear God, When we get to Heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the same old story?

Dear God, Excuse me, but why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not one named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We dogs love a nice ride! I know every breed cannot have its own model, but it would be easy to rename the Chrysler Eagle the Chrysler Beagle!

Dear God, If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, does he still get whacked with a newspaper?

Dear God, Is it true that in Heaven, dining room tables have on ramps?

Dear God, If we come back as humans, does that mean we were good dogs, or bad dogs?

Dear God, More meatballs, less spaghetti.

Dear God, When we get to the Pearly Gates, do we have to do that stupid shake hands trick to get in?

Dear God, Are there dogs on other planets or are we alone? I have been howling at the moon and stars for a long time, but all I ever hear is the angry Dobermann across the street.

Dear God, Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize to them?

Dear God, Is it true that dogs are not allowed in restaurants because we can't make up our minds what NOT to order? Or is it the accident on the carpet thing, again?
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