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12,198 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Well, it's s***...that's right s***. S*** is for sure the most functional word in the Englush language.

You can get s***-faced,

Be s***out of luck,

or have s***for brains.

With a little effort, you can get your s*** together,

find a place for your s***,

or be asked to s*** or get off the pot.

You can smoke s***,

Buy s***,

sell s***,

lose s***,

forget s***,

and tell others to eat s***.

Some people know their s*** while others don't know

s*** from Shinola.

There are lucky s***s,

crazy s***s,

and dumb s***s.

There is bulls***

horse s*** and

chicken s***.

You can throw s***,

sling s***,

catch s***,

shoot the s***

Or duck whebn the s*** hits the fan.

You can give a s***

or serve s*** on a shingle.

You can find yourself in deep s***

or be happier that a pig in s***.

Some days are colder that s***,

some days are hotter than s***,

and some days are just plain s****y.

Some music sounds like s***.

Some things can look like s***,

and there are times you feel like s***.

You can have too much s***,

not enough s***,

the right s***,

the wrong s***

or a lot of weird s***.

You can have a mountain of s***,

or find yourself up s***creek without a paddle.

Sometimes everything you touch turns to s*** ,

and other times you can fall into a bucket of s*** and

come out smelling like a rose.

When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic

building block of the English language.

And remember, once you know your s***, you don't

have to know anything else.

1,724 Posts
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Well, in case someone claims you don't know jack s***, here is his story::wink:


The lineage is finally revealed. Many people are at a loss for a response
when someone says; "You don't know Jack Schitt." Now you can intellectually
handle the situation.

Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer
magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had
one son, Jack. In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, and the deeply
religious couple produced six children: Holy Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva
Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt. But after
being married for 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later
remarried Ted Sherlock and because her kids were living with them, she
wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe
Schitt-Sherlock. Against her parent's objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb
Schitt, the high school dropout. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt
and they produced a son with a nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt. Two of
the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt were inseparable
throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual
ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the
Schitt-Happens wedding. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd and
Hoarse Schitt. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world.
He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt. So
now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt," you can correct him or

Family History Recorded by Crock O. Schitt

8,218 Posts
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Good one SLT.

I've never heard that one before.

1,367 Posts
:lol: :lol: :lol: Funny!!

964 Posts
Actually, I saw an article proclaiming that f*ck was the language's most versatile word. I vote that we put both articles up next to each other to see which one really is.
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